Tuesday 15 March 2016

Where Are The Men?


Where Are The Men?

No this is not an advert for Gulder. Don't know if you have seen this new advert by Gulder on billboards on major roads especially in Lagos. I saw one on Kingsway Road Ikoyi and another on Gbagada Expressway the other day. I have however added my twist to this phrase by placing emphasis on the last two words; the men.

A lot has been happening in the media these days ranging from abduction and forceful marriages to young girls under the guise of religion or what have you, to violent physical assault or domestic violence as the case may be and the culprits have been the seeds of Adam unleashing their unmanly inhuman act on the daughters of Eve. This leads me to ask this question; WHERE ARETHE MEN?
 

They say it's a man's world, a patriarchal society but does this then confer on the human male specie the right to treat the female gender however they deem fit? Seeing the victims of these dastardly acts leaves you in utter amazement and a state of bewilderment on the desperately wicked heart of man knowing fully well that these women or girls as the case may be are clearly no match for them in terms of strength.

I am no feminist and not in a hurry to be one but everyday, I see springing up women support groups and NGOs fighting the course of the women and girl child. These organisations take the pains to be there for the women folk, teaching them how to be responsible, better wives, mothers and business managers. There they learn how to be ladies of virtue, help meet indeed for their husbands, how to love, respect and treat their significant others as the king that he is said to be. In fact from a young age, girls are taught how to keep and run a home, how to defer to the man not necessarily because he is superior but because in the divine order of things that is how it has already been arranged. Those that have also being victims of any sort of violence or inhumane cultural practices are also rehabilitated by these organizations.

However, what I find a bit disturbing and which is putting me in a pensive mood is that we hardly find these sort of groups for the menfolk. I am not saying there aren't but I'm saying it appears they are not enough. Same way the girls are taught from a young age to care and treat the men with respect, young boys should also be raised to know that it is completely unacceptable if not abominable to raise a finger at the opposite sex not to talk of striking or inflicting physical injury with some leading to death.

WHERE ARETHE MEN? The ones who will teach our menfolk the virtue and values of chivalry. The ones who will inculcate in these ones that their strength is meant to be used to protect and defend the woman from harm not test that strength on her.
 
 
 
 

WHERE ARETHE MEN? Who also will take the time to build a network of men support groups all over the nation; mentoring, nurturing and building men of substance, men who are alive to their responsibilities and not just being sperm donors!

While some may argue that women are also guilty and are not exactly saints; but I daresay when it comes to domestic violence for instance, what is the proportion of men that are victims of this act compared to that of the womenfolk? Why must exchange of words degenerate to exchange of blows? Beating a woman at all not to talk of beating to a pulp no matter how provoked is all shades of wrong and must be condemned in the strongest terms. 

This post is not to take a swipe at all men in general because there are quite a number of good ones around who are providing the much needed mentorship and living exemplary lives that young ones can emulate. But this is also a wake up call to all men to do more, this much needed help and support cannot be too much.

Can our real men please stand up?

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